Have you ever gotten a gift card to a place like, say, Amazon?  And it’s not for a huge amount, but you have ALL of Amazon to shop from.  Do you get something you need or want?  Something just for you or for the house?  And the amount, no matter how much, is never quite enough for what you’ve been dreaming of.  And because gift cards don’t come very often, you want to make sure you use it wisely.  It’s torture.  And that pretty much sums up my summer vacations.

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE summer.  Even when it’s 95 degrees, it’s SO much better than freezing my butt off during playground duty in January.  Things are beautifully green, the pool is open, it’s warm, even at night, and I have all this free time!!!  And that’s where the analogy begins.  What in the world do I do with all of this time?

I tend to be a workaholic, so I can always find work to do, it’s the relaxing and doing stuff for myself that’s the struggle.  Last summer was relatively easy because we were opening a new school and a lot of my summer was scheduled for me.  I’ve had those summers full of taking classes or going to meetings to keep me busy.  There’s something weirdly comforting about filling up the calendar with stuff that gives me a sense of purpose.  So I decided that THIS summer, because I had earned it, I was going to R-E-L-A-X.  Which then turns into me sitting around and thinking about what I should do next.  Which then leads to setting goals.  After all, I could set some RELAXING goals, right?  Reading, writing my first blog, napping, taking little rides in my convertible, taking care of my plants, watching TED talks, working on the house.

But did I mention that I’m a teacher?  After about 3 weeks of break and a couple of professional development sessions and some reading and watching TED talks, I start getting anxious for school.  I have all this new STUFF to try out!!  How am I going to rearrange my room, organize lesson plans better, learn more about world drums, yada, yada, yada.  But I have six more weeks of relaxing to do!!

Oh, and my husband is a teacher as well.  Well, he’s a band director.  That’s a teacher, right? Anyway, just when we finally get our breaks together, the craziness begins.  Lots and lots of writing drill, sometimes summer classes, band camp.  So many weeks of relaxing ALONE.  And again, after being with 325 of my favorite elementary kids for 9 months, alone time is a wonderful thing.  I just need to think of more things to do….

So, back to the analogy.  Time in the summer is that wonderful gift card, and I have to decide what I want to do with it.  I don’t want to get back to school in August and wish I had spent it better or regret not really taking time for me.  I want it to be productive and relaxing at the same time.  Not sure I’ve come up with the ultimate solution yet, but in the meantime, here’s to six more weeks of relaxing!