I would love to say I made up this title, but I didn’t.  However, it pretty well sums up what I’ve discovered about leadership.  Please understand that I still have difficulty considering myself a leader, even though lately I seem to find myself included in rooms full of them.  For someone who is an introvert and is afraid of conflict, being selected as someone to lead anything is certainly a challenge.  And I’ve been thinking about how my role as leader has developed through stages.  In doing my research, apparently a lot of people have studied stages of leadership.  Well, this is going to be my personal little analysis, so it may not line up exactly with what the experts say, but maybe some of you can relate.

Stage 1:  Just being noticed.  My favorite character in Winnie the Pooh is Eeyore because I can identify.  I was always pretty quiet and afraid to speak up. There have been a few times in my life when someone recognized something I did and made a big deal about it (at least I thought so!).  In second grade, a little girl got sick right before a program and my teacher chose me to fill in for her singing solo at the last minute.  Wow – she thought I could do it and I did!  I was shaking in my boots, but I did it.  In high school I received an award for having the best attitude in marching band.  It was a big deal for me because it was the one award chosen only by my band director who was like a second father to me.  Then about 13 years ago, a great teacher/mentor called me into his office and asked if I would be interested in serving on the state music educators board in an appointed position.  I was so honored and excited about being asked!!  So, the beginnings of a leader is just someone noticing and encouraging you to step up and serve.  I think it’s important to share that my reaction was one of awe and excitement.  And all about how cool this was for ME.

Stage 2:  Oh shoot – now what do I do?  Reality hits pretty soon after being noticed.  People expect results.  To whom much is given, much is expected, right?  Ok, you’ve been recognized as being able to sing or for having a good attitude or having some leadership skills, so what do you do now?  You set out to prove that you were worthy of being noticed.  After all, in my case, it was still about ME.  I wanted people to like me and what I was doing and how well I could do it.  I worked hard to impress by doing all kinds of things by myself.  See how hard I work?  The problem is, you can’t make everyone happy, no matter what you do.  So, when I was elected to become president of the same board I had been appointed to earlier, I went to a trusted friend who had previously served in that position to ask for advice.  He told me that if I didn’t ruffle a few feathers, I wasn’t doing anything.  What he did was give me permission to think beyond myself and start thinking about the good of the organization and its members.  I’m pretty sure my mantra during that time was “Change is Hard”.  And it did ruffle some feathers.  And I made sure to address each of those ruffled feathers personally.  And for this introverted, conflict hating person it was HARD.  But I did it.

Stage 3:  I don’t have to do it by myself.  Surrounding myself with great people who have individual strengths and vision is the answer because I can’t do it all by myself.  Collaboration is the answer. And encouraging them and trusting them to do their job was my job.  So was encouraging them to do their job when they weren’t doing their job.  A little of the bad with the good.  But such is the life of a leader.  So, now I’m serving on a national board in a room full of leaders.  It’s definitely not all up to me!  But in a room full of leaders, we all know that there will be different perspectives and opinions.  However when you have a shared vision, or know “WHY” you serve, civil discourse and compromise is possible.

I AM a leader and I’ve discovered that great leaders CAN be made, not necessarily born.   And it is my job to serve, guide and encourage others so that we have great future leaders.  Oh, and thanks for noticing me.