“If I see something sagging, bagging or dragging, I’ll get it nipped, tucked or sucked”  Dolly Parton.

I love and admire Dolly Parton. Here is a woman who has succeeded against all odds in an industry that is notoriously unforgiving of age.  While she has done many things to admire her for, I’m going to focus on just one aspect today and that’s ageism.  She completely admits to doing whatever she needs to do as “maintenance” and doesn’t try to hide from her age. She does what she does to make herself look pretty, which I can totally relate to. There are so many “isms” today that I hesitate to even bring up the topic, but as I’m getting older, as we all do, I find myself doing all I can to fight the aging process, not only to feel better about myself and continue to as look as “pretty” as I can, but to fight ageism.  Ok, some of the things I do are a little warped, like continuing to eat hamburgers like a teenager, but none of us is perfect : )

This summer I met a new friend and as we were sitting in meetings, the topic of children came up and she asked me my children’s ages. I proceeded to tell her 33, 29 and 27.  She stopped for a moment and said, “Oh – I thought you were in your 30’s!”.  I can tell you it made my year.  I attribute the way I look to three things; great genes, a great stylist/colorist and fat that plumps out most of the wrinkles.  But the truth is I invest a lot of money each month to cover not just a little gray, but an entire headful of gray.  I do it because of my coloring – gray completely washes out my features as it did my mother’s. I read articles on how women my age should wear their makeup to look younger and I am fighting elastic waistbands and polyester with every fiber of my being.

But of course the inevitable happens.  I’m looking at a bruise on top of my right hand where I had an IV for a colonoscopy earlier this week.  It’s that season of life.  It feels like when we get to a certain age, we start looking for signs of death and deterioration.  Doug is in today for a routine stress test.  Yippee.  Despite what we try to do to remain looking and feeling younger, life and physicians keep reminding us that we’re not.

But it’s not just our healthcare providers that remind us.  I started getting letters from AARP BEFORE my 50th birthday.  Other than considering joining for the travel discounts, I’m fighting this.  I’m getting emails about retirement workshops and social security, like the end is just around the corner.  And it may be, but why should I have to behave like it is? I don’t see myself retiring anytime soon, and if I do it’s going to be because I’ve found something else to do in its place.  I LIKE to work, but when we get to a certain age, whatever that is, we’re encouraged to stop working, like it’s a bad thing.  If you hate your job that much, you should probably be doing something else in the first place.  Senior discounts I’m sure are very nice, especially for those on a fixed income, but even the term “senior” is annoying.  Yes, I’ve got some life experience, but in our society, senior can mean you’re finished and on your way out.

In our youth oriented society, those of us of a certain age can be completely overlooked in terms of the job market.  Employers assume that we’re not going to be there long or in some cases, we have too much experience or cost too much.  Technology for some of us can be the dividing line between relevant or irrelevant.  While my husband loves to be on the cutting edge of technology, I see more value in a more hands-on approach to doing life.  Sure I’ve got my cell phone and my laptop, but my worth as a person or employee shouldn’t be gauged by how well I keep up with the latest and greatest.

Despite all of these things, I wouldn’t go back to being younger for anything.  When someone asks, wouldn’t you love to be 16 or 21 again, I think, Lord no! I knew nothing, had little confidence, no real world experience.  Being in my 50’s has been great as I’ve developed the confidence and gained the knowledge to really show myself and others who I am and what I can do.

So, I’m going to continue to deal with the poking and prodding, and the reminders that I’m getting older.  I’m going to continue to fight it because although I may feel like I’m 16, I certainly don’t look it and well, I’m a girly girl and I like to look pretty!  One day my health may dictate changes in my lifestyle or how I get around, but that doesn’t mean I have to have to have an “old” attitude towards myself or life.   I believe who I am and what I have to say is relevant, despite my lack of technical expertise and I’m going to keep talking about what I believe are relevant issues.  Age is truly just a number and I plan to keep adding those numbers as long as I can and hopefully change people’s ideas of what aging can and should mean.