When I lived in Kentucky and Ohio, the first flakes of snow tended to be slow and gentle. A few flakes would begin and then a few more until finally you had a shower of snowflakes, gracefully landing on everything fairly equally.  In the Great Plains this is simply not the case.  It’s as if God sits up in heaven and says “on your mark, get set… GO!” and all of sudden the snow begins blowing straight across your living room room window from north to south, occasionally making mad swirls as the wind gusts.  There’s nothing the least bit delicate about snow here and only the hardy can deal with it.  After all, this is where I’ve seen people wearing shorts and flip flops, on occasion mowing their lawns while it snows.  I’m not making this stuff up.

It’s that hardiness and no nonsense approach to life that I admire in the people who live here.  You would think that these character traits would make people here detached and unemotional, but it’s the opposite.  There’s a down to earth appreciation for friends and  family, where doing the right thing by them is an automatic and there’s a pride in the longevity of relationships.  Maybe I just wasn’t aware of this in other places I’ve lived, or maybe I wasn’t old enough to really appreciate it.  Regardless, yesterday was one of those times.

Yesterday was wicked cold.  And to make the cold even more fun, the wind decided to crank up a bit.  Nasty stuff.  Anyway, a group of us decided to carpool together to attend the funeral of a friend’s father.  This gentleman had lived a long 92 years, surrounded by his family who sat with him, prayed and sang while he entered heaven.  While I had only met this man once, like those with me, it was the right thing to do to support this good friend and his family dealing with their grief.

There’s nothing like a funeral to get you thinking about life and the things in life that are really important.  Unfortunately my husband wasn’t able to go and so I attended by myself with friends.  These friends have become like family since moving here nearly 19 years ago and while they have known each other for decades, they have included us into their circle.  Sitting there with them, not feeling alone, just made me appreciate them even more.  We’ve worked and traveled together, shared meals together, and celebrated together.  Yep, more like family.

Before the funeral mass, while everyone gathered in the vestibule, an older gentleman walked over to my friend who had lost his father and took him in an emotional embrace.  This wasn’t just anyone, it was my friend’s former music director, still keeping track of him, decades after he had graduated from high school.  In his eighties, with his wife beside him, they made the effort in the nasty cold weather to attend this funeral.  Hardy people. It was the closest I came to crying because I remembered how I felt when my former college band director showed up at my mom’s visitation.  The relationship between a teacher and student can be so powerful, can span decades and continue to inspire those of us who were fortunate to have one of those teachers.  This beautiful couple sat with our group of friends at the funeral, his voice still strong as he sang the hymns, supporting his former student during one of his toughest times.

This same gentleman, after the funeral was over, walked outside to his car in that nasty cold to warm it up so he could drive up to the door to pick up his wife.  Such love and kindness mixed with that midwestern hardiness.  Living a good life for others.  Yes, I learn a lot about life at things like this.

So, when life decides to blow the bitter cold snow sideways into my face, how do I handle it?  Do I go forward, trusting friends and family to be there with me or isolate?  Do I bundle up and face the cold head-on or stay inside where it’s safe and warm ?  Do I keep thinking about myself and my personal comfort or get over myself and think of others?  No, there’s nothing like a funeral to make you think of and observe life.  A life where relationships with kind, hardy people willing to face headlong into a bitter cold, is what life should be about.