The sound caught my attention, despite the the live music being played two rows in front of me.  It was an odd sound, much like the sound  Hannibal Lecter makes when talking about liver and chianti – teeth somewhat like a rabbit with a slight wet sucking sound.  Sorry, but you have to hear it in your head.  Anyway, I didn’t want to be obvious and look around, but it was following the music so it had to be a person, right?

To my right was a very distinguished older gentleman, dressed in a nice suit, sitting with his lovely wife.  Now, when I say older, I mean older than me, which is, well, pretty old.  And there it was.  The Sound.  Teeth over his bottom lip, he was making that sound to the music.  He knew it well, making his sound in “harmony” with the sound of the ensemble, only so much more annoying and I thought, wow, is that was getting older is going to sound like?

Those of us who are getting older like to THINK we’re cool and vibrant and still relevant and that we don’t have any of those old people “traits” that we want to avoid.  We do our very best to get up from a sitting position and not look like it hurts, we try to keep up with our younger counterparts in the way we dress and by coloring our hair, we try to talk the talk but when it comes to technology I haven’t given up, but I’m close.  But it’s those unconscious, not in control sounds and, may I share – smells that worry me.

As I spend time with people my age and older, there seem to be more odious odors that appear out of nowhere, and no matter how you check out the people around you, no body is giving themselves away.  You start to wonder, was it me and I just didn’t realize it?  I’m still at that stage of life where this is unacceptable and really embarrassing, but as I get older is this just going to happen?  And will I too just continue my activities and conversations as if nothing happened?  Do men have this problem too or is it just women?  I don’t remember most men caring at whatever age, so maybe it’s just me…. But I digress.  A lot.

I shared a lovely breakfast with some former students this morning and it was wonderful.  After all, I’m no longer 4x their age, I’m only twice their age.  Math is fun.  Anyway, one of them had shared with her colleagues at work that she was going to meet me and they were intrigued.  You’re going to meet with your elementary music teacher for breakfast?  The main question being why are going to hang out with the old lady you had for a teacher 20 years ago?  The answer she gave to them, as she told the story, was that we had been a part of something special together 20 years ago that gave her an outlet and provided a social group that she felt she didn’t have.  Music and theater turned out to be something special, not only for her, but for a small, close group of kids who did some amazing work.  A group that still stays in touch locally or long distance as she is, for instance,  godmother to another classmate’s children.

She herself is a 1st grade teacher now, having taught 11 years.  It hardly seems possible.  And it’s wonderful to hear her talk about her kids and how she gets to work with student teachers now.  Perhaps the reason we still connect, even with the difference in age, is that we have a meaningful, memorable connection through music.  I continue to be relevant and music still speaks to this group of students as music is ageless.  As we were getting ready to part ways, one of my students said, let’s not wait another 20 years to do this.  Well, if we did, that would make me 80.  Perhaps closer to the age of that gentleman down the row from me last night.  And despite the age difference between this gentleman and myself, we had something very important in common – the music we love and continue to learn about and listen to.  Only I sat quietly and he didn’t.  Perhaps in another 20 years however,  someone else will look at me down the row and ask, what is that sound?