The need to write has been crushing me today, but like all writers, at one time or another, there comes the classic writer’s block.  Part of my problem, I’m sure, is that I don’t go anywhere.  I go to work and I come home to work.  I want to write, but I feel guilty that I’m writing for fun and not working.  Hence, writer’s block.  The mantra however is just to write – write whatever comes to mind.  So hang on – my mind is a scary place so this could go anywhere.

Hallmark movies.  I’ve never been a fan.  Too formulaic, especially this time of year.  Ever title is “Christmas in (name the locale)”.  Boy gets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl.  It’s a musical without the music.  The dialog is predictable and stilted, the storyline is predictable, the ending is – well – predictable.  All the cliché romantic things you ever want to see in a movie are here.  I used to think that people watched these for the romantic, happily ever after stories.  But I’m starting to wonder if, in this very unpredictable world, if people aren’t grabbing predictable wherever they can.  There’s never a “what if” to deal with.  Maybe what we need to prescribe to everyone is to watch a Hallmark movie every day to relieve the stress.  

Dolly Parton.  Everywhere I looked today on TV, there was Dolly Parton.  Dolly Parton movies, Dolly Parton concerts, Dolly Parton biographies.  She’s fascinating, I get it.  The ultimate dumb blonde joke, where the woman isn’t dumb or blonde but a woman ahead of her time, brought up in a part of the country behind the times.  I of course know she’s a songwriter, but not sure I knew just how prolific a songwriter.  A songwriter who writes songs that touches people.  It wasn’t the music that got me, it was the reaction of someone in an audience listening to her music that got me.  That moment when the music touched a chord in a woman and I saw the tears well up in her eyes.  Because I deal with music every day, sometimes I forget how powerful it can be. 

Speaking of music, I found myself stopping to listen to and enjoy music this week.  Not always intentionally, but as I was channel surfing I came across Josh Grobin on a PBS special.  Now, I love Josh, but my husband says he can’t deal with the vibrato.  I probably shouldn’t admit that on occasion, it’s a tiny bit much for me as well, but his sense of pitch and his musicality are spectacular.    I stopped to listen, the song building to the climatic moment, and instead of some loud, power ballad ending, he stops and from this man comes the most stunning sound.  So in tune, so in control, so dynamically nuanced that I couldn’t breathe and the tears welled.  One note. 

TV fireplaces.  I told you my mind was a scary place.  A couple of nights this week, I’ve put on Netflix and located the fireplace video.  Is it weird that it feels warmer in the room when it’s on?  I actually fell asleep one night, the light of the “fire” flickering as I drifted off.  What is about a crackling fire that makes a place feel more homey?  I’m thinking the Danish have the right idea with the Hygge thing.  I have to admit that piling on the soft pillows, warm throws, Christmas lights and yes, even the TV fireplace have made the last few days cozier.  Especially as I sat here and watched the snow fall last night.  I’m figuring out that I’m going to have to create the atmosphere I need this winter and not wait for some warm and fuzzy feeling to just show up.  

Last but not at all least, teachers.  I have lived in the world of teaching for so long.  In my 30 years in this profession, I can honestly say that I have met very few who most definitely chose the wrong profession or should have retired earlier than they did. The first group usually figures it out early, the second one, not always.  The point being the majority of people in this profession are the cream of the crop, the kind of people who will give and give, take a breath and then give some more.  Can I be honest?  If I hear another teacher say “this just isn’t my best teaching this year”, I may scream.  This may not be their most comfortable year teaching, it may be awkward, and in the case of music teachers, they may feel hindered by all the rules and safety regs but their teaching is extraordinary.  Their work to reach students, not only in person but remotely, and build relationships is second to none.  I’ve been observing teachers this past semester, and every one of them, despite the challenges and changes to routine, show up every day with a smile on their faces for the kids, practice their art form within the parameters they’ve been given and give 110% or more.  They’re giving up more personal time to learn, plan, adapt and clean, taking time away from their own families.  If this isn’t your best teaching, I don’t know what you expect of yourselves but it’s unreasonable.  You are amazing and when you get through the next seven days in my district, I hope you take a real break and refresh.  You’ve more than earned it.

So, how to end this thing.  What is it that occupies your mind and what kinds of questions does it make you ask?  How do you share what it is you’ve been contemplating?  What is it in your life that makes you wonder? How in the world do you stop a stream of consciousness?!?